Devishly Attractive Contestants Compete in This Year’s Mr. Payson

Attributions: 
By Sarah Webber
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             Mr. Payson began with a bang as Sam Critchfield, Kai Schultz, Oscar Contreras,Broden Parken, Brady Terry, Philip Catalano, KC King, Zac Quist, and Garret Carter emerged in Caveman Loin-cloths, dancing provocatively to the Grammy winning Tarzan soundtrack. With each rippling muscle, I knew it was going to be a good night.
 The night’s talent Competition was highlighted by Payson’s very own Andrew Wright clogging in his gangsta pants his mother gave him. During the Talent Contest you saw just about everything (especially with some of those costumes), from Critchfield’s booty-shaking hula, to Contrera’s Micheal Jackson revival, to Terry’s sweet serenade sung to a bag of sugar, totally awesome dancing moves by Catalano and Carter; and Parkin, Shultz, and King wowed us with their musically (or not so musically) inclined voices. 
My Personal Favorite was definitely the Swimsuit Competition. The event was filled with great eye candy and lots of laughs laughs. Contreras seemed to have just emerged from the shower as he appeared on stage glistening and dripping water everywhere. Garret sported an all-American bathing suit from Wal-Mart, complete with floaties and flip flops. Quist seemed to have misread the event, as he appeared on stage for the swimsuit competition in full on winter coat, gloves, pants, and a confused look on his face. Critchfield sported an extremely hairy chest in this event that somehow magically disappeared later that evening, and looked almost identical to the beard Parkin Sprouted for the interview Competition. 
The interview portion of the competition is where things really got crazy, and we heard something’s about the contestants that we really didn’t need to know.   The evening wear was even more shocking, from Carter’s red long-johns with toilet paper still intact, Parkin’s see-though long-johns, Catalano’s snazzy suit and glasses,  Quist’s lion get-up, and  Contrera’s return-of-the-Hippie.   
Then the returning 2008-2009 Mr. Payson Colton Carr to perform his you-tube inspired dance to “harder better faster stronger” by Daft Punk. The night ended with the crowning of our 2009-2010 Mr. Payson; Zac Quist, First Attendant Broden Parkin, and Second Attendant Garret Carter.   “The Mr. Payson Pageant was so much fun, we all really bonded, and I am so glad that I got to be a part of Mr. Payson” said Mr. Payson Zac Quist.  
Way to go guys! The cheerleaders did the great job turning the auditorium into a magical jungle. Mr. Wright and Ms. Ralph did a wonderful and slightly cynical job of being master and mistress of ceremonies. My only question is, is there a Mr. Utah? Because if there is, the other contestants better watch out for Mr. Payson!